carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
