Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
