She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Threesome in a minivan. New low
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
