Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
