i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
i think i just lost a toe
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
