The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I understand Curling. That high.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Randomize
