I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
How external is "for external use only"?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
