i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
