dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
