I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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