I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
