my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
