It's like a parade of train wrecks.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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