Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
