FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
the day after is always just damage control
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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