i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
time to smoke my breakfast
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
