found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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