Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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