Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
