you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
