I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
