Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
