Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Randomize
