I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
