why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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