he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
