Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
