You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
