i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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