he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
