Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
