dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
