i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize