dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
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