i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
