The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
