physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
You smell like stripper and shame
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize