Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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