So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
