Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
