Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
