what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
