I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
