My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Randomize
