i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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