He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
