she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
