Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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