I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
