and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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